April’s Lesson from Thirty Nine: It Is Not April’s Fools, but Appreciate More Death
In advance, I would like to express my gratitude to Alvian, my friend, that has recommended me Thirty Nine Korean Drama in the early of April. Thanks to him, this series taught me a lot about death in a good way. Also I thank Alvian, Naya, and Regina that willingly listened to my deep concern about death, life, and uncommon problems such as how I despise this world, sometimes. Also, not to mention some of my close friends that let me talk endlessly about something “abstract” that even you guys do not understand or have no interest.
Death, most of us do not want to talk about this since it means that it is the end of our lives in this world. No more fun, no more time to breathe. But somehow, this is one of the topics that I would love to talk about the most. I appreciate death as much as I appreciate life. Both are important to understand each other. But, with Thirty Nine as supporting factors, I can appreciate death deeply time to time. If I were rarely thinking about my death every day, now I am brave enough to set how long my life would end.
I decided to limit my life for one year long. It does not mean I want to die so badly, but as a reminder to appreciate more life and death.
I can express how much this Thirty Nine series is related to me. Since when I was kid, I have been romanticising friendship more than anything. I value them more than a couple relationship which never crossed in my mind to have one. This series, successfully, shows how a friendship can have a strong bond and value. I do believe that people come and go, so is in friendship. But, this series shows me that this kind of friendship can only be separated by death, one of their best friends. The strong bond that they possess touches me very deeply.
Regarding death, I have witnessed three of my beloved people died, my lovely aunt, my great grandmother whom I really wanted to talk to, and my grandparents. One of the death was very tragic which caused trauma to myself. In Thirty Nine series, one of their best friends is diagnosed with a cancer and immediately she becomes terminally ill person. When the day comes, I can feel the deeply-rooted sadness inside them, it made me burst into tears.
So, what friendship and death have to do with Thirty Nine series? As mentioned above, those are deeply related to me, therefore Thirty Nine has a personal value to me, moreover when I was watching it. I cried for every episode, obviously.
There is one thing that I would like to put emphasis on, it is how their best friends living their lives while knowing one of them is going to die soon, terminally ill. Also, how Chan Young, the terminally ill person, start noticing her life after getting diagnosed.
We want to make you the happiest terminally ill person.
That is one part that her best friends said to her after several days getting diagnosed. That promise possesses sadness and happiness at the same time for me. Her best friends make a to-do list with Chan Young to make sure she will be happy. Not only that, they also spend more time to take care of Chan Young. Their efforts must be appreciated, it really touched me. Not to mention they always cry behind Chan Young’s back since you need to be happy with someone you dearly love the most while knowing it won’t last long due to her death. You need to stay happy until you receive the information of her death. They are getting anxious every time their phone are ringing, since it possibly comes from Chan Young family to inform the death of Chan Young. When the day comes… (intentionally blank due to moment break to cry)
Chan Young lives her life with many changes, particulary the way she perceives the world. She starts noticing the little things that happen in her life and appreciate them better. She wants to do better for everyone before her death. She can appreciate more kindness from her surroundings. It really touched me on many levels. Sometimes, I overlooked many things behind and kept focusing on the other things that probably would worsen my life. I am fully aware that I, many times, ignore those important matters and it makes me deeply sad. I can endlessly curse myself for doing that in the middle of night. But this series, especially Chan Young, taught me to pay attention to the details in life and appreciate them more.
I thing it’s pretty obvious why I limit myself by setting when I might die every year. I hope I can appreciate more life, more beings, more moments with myself and my surroundings. To close this reflection note, I send warm hug to you and I thank you for reading this meaningless writing :) I love you.
